Stop Suicide Now... / Chelle Wilkinson (Mom)
As most of you know, last year our family was hit hard with the death of our son Christopher. At 16-years-old our son committed suicide. I hate typing that; even worse is saying it. The fact remains our son took his life. The second week of September is Suicide Prevention Week. This is sponsored by the American Association of Suicidology and has been moved from May to September to synchronize the week with World Suicide Prevention Day, now set as September 10th.
I admit I never talked to my children about suicide. I made sure I talked to them about smoking, drugs, sex and the dangers of alcohol, but never suicide. I never once thought that would ever come up. I thought I covered all the basics with Chris. I thought by loving him, giving him a safe home, schooling, material things and all that parents give their kids, he would never do THAT! I mean I even prayed for him daily! I will never know if talking to him about suicide could have or would have made a difference. But I can say something now to my living children and make sure I include the talk about suicide. As with any one of “the talks” parents sometimes dread, we must address the issues that face our children. We need to equip them with the tools to understand what waits and lurks out there to harm them and mislead them. Unfortunately most parents do not remember what it was like to be their kid’s age, and we forget the pressures that await our children. The sad thing is that our children are facing more temptations and choices and making harder decisions than we ever had to do. Maybe that is why the statistics for teen suicide are alarming? I not only want to address teen suicide but suicide as a whole. I was very alarmed when I did the research on the statistics for suicide in our country. I decided to list them so you can see for yourself.
Youth Suicide Fact Sheet
In 2003, suicide ranked as the third leading cause of death for young people (ages 15-19 and 15-24); only accidents and homicides occurred more frequently.
Whereas suicides accounted for 1.3% of all deaths in the U.S. annually, they comprised 11.9% of all deaths among 15-24 year olds.
In 2003, 31,484 people completed suicide. Of these, 3,988 were completed by people between the ages of 15 and 24.
Suicide rates for 15-24 year olds have more than doubled since the 1950s and remained largely stable at these higher levels between the late 1970s and the mid 1990s. They have declined 28.5% since 1994.
In the past 60 years, the suicide rate has quadrupled for males 15 to 24 years old and has doubled for females of the same age (CDC, 2002).
Suicide rates for those 15-19 years old increased 19% between 1980 and 1994. Since the peak in 1994 with 11.0 suicides per 100,000, there has been a 34% decrease. In 2003, the rate was 7.3 per 100,000.
Males between the ages of 20 and 24 were 6 times more likely than females to complete suicide. Males between 15 and 19 were 4.4 times more likely than females to complete suicide (2003 data).
For every completed suicide by youth, it is estimated that 100 to 200 attempts are made. Based on the 2003 Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance Survey, 8.5% of students in grades 9 through 12 reported.
Each year, there are approximately 10 youth suicides for every 100,000 youth.
Each day, there are approximately 11 youth suicides.
Every 2 hours and 11 minutes, a person under the age of 25 commits suicide.
Suicide Among Children
In 2003, 244 children ages 10 to 14 completed suicide in the U.S.
Suicide rates for those between the ages of 10-14 increased 99% between 1980 and 1997. This age group has shown a 21% decrease since 1997. For 2003, the rate is 1.15 per 100,000.
Although their rates are lower than those of Caucasian youth, African-American youth (ages 10-14) showed the largest increase in suicide rates between 1980 and 1995 (233%). The rate for African American males ages 10-14 was 1.88 per 100,000 in 2003.
In the 10 to 14-year-old age group, Caucasian youths (ranked 3rd leading cause of death) were far more likely to complete suicide than African American youths (ranked 5th leading cause of death). Caucasian males between 10 and 14 years of age were 3.4 times more likely to complete suicide than Caucasian females of the same age.
I challenge you as a parent, if you have not had "the talks," please consider adding a talk about suicide. As parents we need to bring light to the darkness and talking about suicide does just that.
Here are the warning signs and some listed websites you can go to for more help. Please feel free to PM me or email me anytime!
Understanding and Helping the Suicidal Individual
***BE AWARE OF THE WARNING SIGNS*** Are you or someone you love at risk of suicide? Get the facts and take appropriate action. Get help immediately by contacting a mental health professional or calling 1-800-273-8255 for a referral should you witness, hear, or see anyone exhibiting any one or more of the following:
~Someone threatening to hurt or kill him/herself, or talking of wanting to hurt or kill him/herself.
~Someone looking for ways to kill him/herself by seeking access to firearms, available pills, or other means.
~Someone talking or writing about death, dying or suicide, when these actions are out of the ordinary for the person.
Seek help as soon as possible by contacting a mental health professional or calling
1-800-273-8255 for a referral should you witness, hear or see anyone exhibiting any one or more of the following:
~Hopelessness
~Rage, uncontrolled anger, seeking revenge
~Acting reckless or engaging in risky activities, seemingly without thinking
~Feeling trapped – like there’s no way out
~Increased alcohol or drug use
~Withdrawing from friends, family and society
~Anxiety, agitation, unable to sleep or sleeping all the time
~Dramatic mood changes
~No reason for living; no sense of purpose in life
***BE AWARE OF THE FACTS*** 1. Suicide is preventable. Most suicidal individuals desperately want to live; they are just unable to see alternatives to their problems.
2. Most suicidal individuals give definite warnings of their suicidal intentions, but others are either unaware of the significance of these warnings or do not know how to respond to them.
3. Talking about suicide does not cause someone to be suicidal.
4. Approximately 32,000 Americans kill themselves every year. The number of suicide attempts is much greater and often results in serious injury.
5. Suicide is the third leading cause of death among young people ages 15-24, and it is the eighth leading cause of death among all persons.
6. Youth (15-24) suicide rates increased more than 200% from the 1950’s to the late 1970’s. Following the late 1970’s, the rates for youth suicide have remained stable.
7. The suicide rate is higher among the elderly (over 65) than any other age group.
8. Four times as many men kill themselves as compared to women, yet three times as many women attempt suicide as compared to men.
9. Suicide occurs across all age, economic, social, and ethnic boundaries.
10. Firearms are currently the most utilized method of suicide by essentially all groups (male, female, young, old, white, non-white).
11. Surviving family members not only suffer the trauma of losing a loved one to suicide, but may themselves be at higher risk for suicide and emotional problems.
***WAYS TO BE HELPFUL TO SOMEONE WHO IS THREATENING SUICIDE*** 1. Be aware. Learn the warning signs.
2. Get involved. Become available. Show interest and support.
3. Ask if he/she is thinking about suicide.
4. Be direct. Talk openly and freely about suicide.
5. Be willing to listen. Allow for expression of feelings. Accept the feelings.
6. Be non-judgmental. Don’t debate whether suicide is right or wrong, or feelings are good or bad. Don’t lecture on the value of life.
7. Don’t dare him/her to do it.
8.Don’t give advice by making decisions for someone else to tell them to behave differently.
9. Don’t ask ‘why’. This encourages defensiveness.
10. Offer empathy, not sympathy.
11. Don’t act shocked. This creates distance.
12. Don’t be sworn to secrecy. Seek support.
13. Offer hope that alternatives are available, do not offer glib reassurance; it only proves you don’t understand.
14. Take action! Remove means! Get help from individuals or agencies specializing in crisis intervention and suicide prevention.
***BE AWARE OF FEELINGS, THOUGHTS, AND BEHAVIORS*** Nearly everyone at some time in his or her life thinks about suicide. Most everyone decides to live because they come to realize that the crisis is temporary, but death is not. On the other hand, people in the midst of a crisis often perceive their dilemma as inescapable and feel an utter loss of control. Frequently, they:
~Can’t stop the pain
~Can’t think clearly
~Can’t make decisions
~Can’t see any way out
~Can’t sleep, eat or work
~Can’t get out of the depression
~Can’t make the sadness of away
~Can’t see the possibility of change
~Can’t see themselves as worthwhile
~Can’t get someone’s attention
~Can’t see to get control
***TALK TO SOMEONE – YOU ARE NOT ALONE*** CONTACT:
~A community mental health agency
~A school counselor or psychologist
~A suicide prevention/crisis intervention center
~A private therapist
~A family physician
~A religious/spiritual leader
For more information, please use one of these resources:
American Association of Suicidology
5521 Wisconsin Avenue, NW
Washington, DC 20015
Phone: (202) 237-2280
Fax: (202) 237-2280
Email: info@suicidology.org
Website: www.suicidology.org
NotMyKid.org
National Mental Health Association
For Teens: TEACH Hotline.org
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